Me?
by Tweek Tweekers
Summary: Kyle doesn't stand a chance...or so he thought.


Bebe Stevens is one of the most cutest girls in all of South Park. She's smart, outgoing, funny, silly and she's beautiful. Unlike most girls in South Park she's actually not a whore, even if we all thought she was going to be one she turned out to be the most classy girl ever. She never reveals too much but manages to look good. She has a natural beauty and the most perfect personality. You'd think that she'd have tons of boyfriends but that would not be correct. She hasn't had a boyfriend since fourth grade yeah we're sophmores now! It's not because she can't get a guy, I mean almost everyone in our school likes her, most guys want to fuck her so bad that they act completely retarded in front of her to try and get her attention. She doesn't seem to care if guys throw themselves at her, she doesn't like them.

"Hey Bebe, wanna catch a movie sometime?" asked Clyde trying to sound cool with his retarded lisp. He's a fuck off no one likes him, he's just the stereotypical jock. He's nothing but a dirty player.

"Not really. I can just watch something on TV." she replied completely uninterested.

"Yeah Clyde fuck off. Want to hang out with me tonight? We can go out to dinner or something?" asked Kenny playing it cool.

"Sorry not interested in bread and butter for dinner but thanks anyways." Oh yeah forgot to mention she can kind of be a bitch but that's one of the many reasons guys want her. They know they can't have her.

"Wanna hang out with me and Tweek today after school?" asked Craig casually. He already came out of the closest. Yup that's right, Craig, Mr. Badass is a fag. Not that I'd make fun of him I mean I want to keep my face looking like this.

"Agh! Yeah we're getting coffee! Nngh! As long as the gnomes don't come and -nngh! - kill me! Oh Jesus!" Tweek spazzed. I feel bad for that fuck. Luckily he has Craig to protect him from getting picked on, but he makes it so easy.

"Thanks guys but I can't, I have a ton of homework!" she replied putting emphasis on the statement. She smiled and continued to walk down the hall getting 'hey's' and 'hi's' left and right.

I know for a fact I won't be able to ever get with Bebe, so I don't bother trying to flirt or even talk to her for that matter. She's too perfect for me.

She passed by me giving me a shining smile. I just gave her a half smile not wanting to freak her out. Then she glared at me annoyed. I don't have a clue what I did. Oh well. I closed my locker and went to class.

The day passed by quick and before I knew it the school bell rang. "Hey Kyle let's go to my house and play the new game I just bought." said Stan, my super best friend since forever.

"Ok sure. I'll catch up with you first I have to go to the library and return this book before I get in trouble for stealing it or something gay like that." I rolled my eyes annoyed but he nodded in understanding and left.

After I dropped my book off at the school library I walked outside. Everyone was gone except for one person swinging on the swing. She had a bright flashing smile and her eyes were fluttered shut while she swung higher and higher into the sky. I walked over too mesmerized by her beauty to realize I probably looked really creepy just staring at her. "Ah…" I muttered really quietly to myself.

She opened one of her eyes and peered over at me still smiling, "Hi Kyle? Like the view?"

I snapped out of it quick, "Uh…sure. It's just looks really fun."

She dragged on her feet on the ground waiting to come to a stop, she then looked over at me with a cheeky grin, "It is." she said in an almost angelic voice. "I feel like I'm soaring through the sky not having to worry about anything. No worries. No problems. No drama. No stupid drooling idiots."

"Sorry I brought you back to reality." I apologized getting a stupid giggling grin from her. Absolutely adorable, but again I have no chance, so I'll stick to being casual with her.

"It's ok…I wish I could live in my fantasies."

"Why? Your life is so perfect. Everyone loves you, you get asked out twenty four seven." I sat on the swing beside her.

She sighed, "Yeah whatever."

"Huh?" I moaned curiously.

"Well just because guys swoon over me it doesn't mean I like them or I like the attention. I don't dress like a hooker, I don't want that much attention from them. I don't care what they think of me." she groaned annoyed from her thoughts, "It's just some of them are so arrogant and I know they only think of one thing. Getting me in bed. Not gonna happen, I will not be another whore in South Park, I refuse!"

I couldn't help but smile. I'm surprised that someone from South Park has so much pride and strength. "That's good. I know a lot of girls that want the attention you get and try really hard. Let's just call them hoes."

She giggled, "There is only one person in this whole school I wish would look at me more. He's the one guy I want to ask me out and like me."

"Really? He must be really stupid to not realize."

"Yeah he's stupid alright. I mean I thought I was giving pretty good signals."

"Hey you can't help it, some people in South Park are just retarded. You could probably give a ton of subtle messages and he'll probably never know." I replied hoping I would cheer her up. Honestly if she wants them to get the courage to ask her out then she really needs to send BIG messages.

She bit her lip, "He's just oblivious I guess. I mean I send some major messages. I smile at him in the halls, I start our conversations, I stare at him in class, I ask him for help on homework, I rub against him in the hall but he can't tell at all, it's pitiful how naïve he can be."

"Yeah. I mean you know for a fact he's missing out."

"Really you think so?" she asked.

I shrugged and nodded, "Yeah everyone wants you but for you to want someone is pretty intense."

"Yeah." she laughed, "Too bad he doesn't want me."

"I wonder why? I mean your pretty, funny, smart and very nice. Almost 100% perfect!"

"Almost?" she repeated added a hint of question into it.

"Oh yeah well you have hazel eyes I personally like blue eyes." I replied in a sarcastic tone.

Then after a few moments she muttered faintly, "I can wear contacts if you want…"

My brow furrowed and I turned to her confused, she was gazing at me almost desperately. Her eyes looked sad and she was gently biting her lip. "What?"

"I mean eye color is fixable. I can just wear contacts, it's easily fixable!" she said eagerly.

"I was joking I like your eyes." I said with a smirk but confusion taking over most of my face.

"Then why don't you like me? Why don't you notice me? I smile at you in the hall but you turn away uninterested. I lean against you when you try to teach me stuff but you just continue talking about boring shit I don't even care about. You don't even talk to me most of the time!" I noticed a tear fall from her face, "I don't get it…what's wrong with me? What don't you like? I'll fix it!"

"Bebe…"

"Please Kyle! If it's my hair I'll dye it!"

"But Bebe…"

"No seriously! If it's my skin I'll go tanning more!"

"No…"

"Oh no it's my nose! It's big! But I can get a nose job!"

"No way!"

"Oh no! It's my body! I'll work out way more! I can cut down on my sugar inta-"

"BEBE!" I shouted not wanting to hear her list things bad about her, I mean I think she's beautiful and so doesn't need to go anorexic. "I don't think anything's wrong with you it's just a lot to take in."

"What?" she asked confused but still sad.

"Well I never thought I'd have a chance with you but I've always been attracted to you."

"Really?" she asked her voice full of hope.

"Yeah, I mean I want to ask you out I just didn't want to get hurt like everyone else. You know?"

"Kyle…" she whispered, "Can I kiss you?"

"No." her eyes went shocked and she grew sad, "I'm going to kiss you." I stood up from the swing, grabbed her hand and stood her up, she gently stood on her tip toes and I kissed her gently on the lips. My arms slowly making their way around her fragile hips, she soon replied by wrapping her tiny arms around my neck and going under my hat into my curly hair. She moaned delighted by the kiss. That made me happy. We pulled apart and she pouted. "I can't wait to brag to everyone about how the douche Kyle could get a girl like you."

She laughed and punched me gently and kissed me again. Yeah she kissed me. The hottest, nicest, smartest, funniest, most beautiful girl in the whole entire world kissed me, I must be awesome.


End file.
